By Klaus Döring
Negativity or pessimism is a tendency to be downbeat, disagreeable, and skeptical. It’s a pessimistic attitude that always expects the worst. Negative outcomes are bad outcomes, like losing a game, getting a disease, suffering an injury, or getting something stolen.
Especially nowadays, we feel our life is turning miserably. Our negativity doesn’t allow us to keep our eyes, ears – and, most important! – our minds, hearts and souls opened. We’re reaching our breaking point.
As I said several months ago here: this breaking point can be the prelude to our strongest moment. It is when we reach our breaking point, that we discover our real strength. Allow me to ask you, my dear readers, “What happens to you or with you when you reach your breaking point?” Do you face it or do you run away?
I’ll be giving you a very simple answer: If you face it – you break it. If you run away (and/or close your ears, eyes and mouth) – it surely breaks you!
Every day – a dull reality! Many of us will answer this question with a big YES! Actually, we do like to cover a newborn’s day already with a gray veil? Each day has a new face, but sometimes we don’t have the strength to watch its countenance. Of course, not every day has adventures and highlights.
But we enjoy quarreling and arguing. With other people and even with ourselves.
Contrary to what might be expected, I look back on experiences that, at the same time, seemed especially desolating and painful with particular satisfaction. Indeed, everything I have learned, everything that has truly enhanced and enlightened my existence, has been through affliction and not through happiness.
If it ever were to be possible to eliminate affliction from your earthly existence, the result would not be to make life delectable, but to make it too banal and trivial to be endurable.
By observation, we can feel that many of us need help to manage our everyday life. We need something that would keep us going as we journey through life. Many times we can also learn from other people and their experiences. I feel much better in the circle of my Pinoy family.
And here is one more thing: Affection is the humblest love – it gives itself no airs. It lives with humble and private things: soft slippers, old clothes, old jokes, and the thump of a sleepy dog’s tail on the kitchen floor. The glory of affection, the disposition of mind, the good will and tender attachment, is that it can unite those who are not “made for one and another”, people. Who, if not out down by fate in the same household or community, would have nothing to do with one and another.
For me life has been a thing of ups and downs in approximately equal measure. I don’t have something sensational to report every day about my progress. Often, I wonder if fulfillment in life is necessarily tied to change for the better.
Since this pandemic changed my life dramatically, I start my day with a positive outlook. Don’t start your day guessing that something will go wrong, instead go out with a positive mindset and convince yourself you’ll succeed.
Sad and depressing stories filled the newscasts and tabloids these days. If you’re struggling to be optimistic, avoid gloomy stories because they will only worsen your mood.
Positive thinking doesn’t mean you should wipe out negativity. Learn from your mistakes by reflecting on how you should have handled the circumstance in a different way and, thus, changing its outcome.
Very important: avoid cynical people because they may increase your stress level and make you doubt your ability to manage stress in healthy ways. In addition, be with people who are positive, supportive, and willing to give you useful feedback and advice. My “friend lists” in Social Media are getting smaller and smaller … .
One simple rule—say nothing to yourself that you won’t say to anyone else. If a negative thought enters your mind, assess it and respond with affirmations (positive views you say aloud to boost yourself). Change your “I’ve never done this” statement with “I’ll tackle it from a different angle.”
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Seek humor in your daily life’s happenings. When you laugh at life, you’ll sense less strain.
Sing. It doesn’t matter if the entire tune is off-key. It will make you better!
Write down your achievements. Once you stop being pessimistic, you’ll realize tons of good things happen in your life more than you thought.
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You can email me: doringklaus@gmail.com or follow me on Facebook, LinkedIn or Twitter or visit one of my websites www.germanexpatinthephilippines.blogspot.com or www.klausdoringsclassicalmusic.blogspot.com .