By Engr. Carlos V. Cornejo
This was from a homily given by Fr. Terrance Chartier, a Franciscan Friar of the Immaculate, who gives spiritually nourishing sermons regularly on YouTube. He says, a way to find out if we have a healthy spiritual life is examining ourselves on three things: (1) How is our tongue? Do we speak words that build or tear down others? (2) Are we focused on other’s faults or our own? And (3) How do we respond to life’s difficulties that test our faith?
We ought to remember that we are always a student trying to learn from the master. Our master is Christ and the class is always in session. We don’t take day offs or vacations in this class with our Lord because the devil who constantly tempts us never takes any vacations too as St. Josemaria Escriva would say. In other words, we always have to be on guard in our spiritual life or engaged in a spiritual battle because we can fall into temptation anywhere and anytime.
Guarding our Tongue
“For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” (Matthew 12:37) The quantity of words we speak don’t matter much but the quality. We can be the talkative type and that’s fine, as long as we don’t speak hurtful words that tear down others. A good principle to follow and you can apply this very much in social media is, “If you can’t say something nice, then don’t say it.” If we have an issue with a certain person better settle it in private rather than in the gaze of many, where words could get out of hand, become nasty and forever tarnish your reputation. If you are in a political debate, just try to stick with the political issues being argued and you need not resort to attacking the other party personally. “The tongue of the wise brings healing.” (Proverbs 12:18) Better yet we should uplift each other and give hope to each other for we are in the same family of Christ.
Focus More on Our Behavior
“Why do you see the speck in your neighbor’s eye, but do not notice the log in your own eye? Or how can you say to your neighbor, ‘Friend, let me take out the speck in your eye,’ when you yourself do not see the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighbor’s eye.” (Luke 6:41-42) There is a great size difference between a speck and a log. This is to emphasize that our own bad behavior that needs to be corrected first, is worse in gravity and in malice than that of our neighbor that we want to correct. How can an alcoholic father for example be in position of authority to correct his children of their lesser faults? We ought to give good examples to one another especially if we are in power or authority. If children get to see their parents sorry and remorseful of their faults and tries to mend their ways, then they will learn to say sorry to others too and rectify their mistake.
It’s easy to point out and criticize others’ mistake but be blind to our own. Some people play the see-saw game in relationships. In a see-saw you push the opposite fellow riding the see-saw down and you rise up. We engage in back-biting instead of correcting that person in order to elevate the status of our behavior, feeling we are better or superior than that person we are criticizing. We should try to correct the behavior of that person in private or through his or her superior rather than resort to gossiping. And we should not compare ourselves to others but compare ourselves only to Christ and to His Blessed Mother. And we will find out we are all in need of correcting our character.
Responding to Life’s Difficulties
“My brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of any kind, consider it nothing but joy, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance; and let endurance have its full effect, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking in nothing.” (James 1:2-3) We might find it a bit strange to make ourselves joyful when facing trials as St. James would advise us, because trials always give us pain. But St. James is telling us to look on the positive side of difficulties to make us spiritually mature. To be spiritually mature means to practice the virtues such as humility, hard work, perseverance, loyalty, etc. And virtues can only be truly acquired if we undergo testing on that virtue. The best way to be humble is when you are humiliated. The best way to acquire the virtue of diligence and hard work is when idleness and living a comfortable life would tempt us. Or the best way to practice loyalty is when a certain individual we look up to gives up or suddenly becomes disloyal to a commitment such as marriage or priesthood. For “virtue is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9). Virtue can only be strongly established in us if it’s tested. And lastly, St. James tells us that trials “makes us complete or lacking nothing” which means we can only be holy or perfect through trials or sacrifice because the essence of love is sacrifice. When we love, we have to sacrifice. St. John Mary Vianney says, “The only cross is not to have a cross.” Or the only difficulty is not to have a difficulty, for in difficulties we find wisdom and holiness.
