By Raoul Suarez
I saw a brother write something on his Facebook wall about being older than his classmates and it gave me a flashback of how it was like to go back to school at the age of 30 plus.
My classmates were kids half my age. The teachers, who used to be new, have aged quite well. Some of my classmates over a decade ago were already part of the faculty. I had to wear a uniform along with the other undergrads as part of compliance. I had to get a haircut that was required based on school standards. I also had to queue up for payments and other enrollment red tape.
Did it bother me to be back in school when I was already a middle-aged man with a nice resume built by working for the BPO? Somewhat. Yes. But I realized that it was more fun than what it was a couple of years ago. For a lot of reasons.
We were allowed to use gadgets inside the classroom. Most of my teachers did not mind if I was playing games on my phone because I was made to sit in the back row and was told to just keep quiet. “Indi ka na sagad gahod, ipatapuson ka na namon ya basta ga-attend ka lang klase kag gakuha exam nga may passing grade ka.” Something like that. It was cool.
There was no need to bring a notebook. I have been used to working in a paperless environment and I can just jot down notes on my phone. I had classmates who liked to do it old school using pen and paper. For me though, having access to my cellphone was more convenient. Mobile phones already had cameras. Back in the old days, you had to borrow somebody’s notebook and had to get it photocopied for a fee. It was a waste of paper and money. Technology enabled me to just take pictures of the notes and I can read them anytime anywhere. It was so convenient that I can even just send private messages to my classmates so they can send me screenshots of their notes. It was cool.
My classmates were very supportive. I’m imagining that maybe the feeling was somewhat similar to what kids were experiencing when visiting a museum and what it’s like to be in awe of dinosaurs. I was part of the program when it was launched. I was a pioneer. Ten years or so after that, I was back and hanging out with kids fresh from high school. The “manong/kuya/tito” vibe was real. They would adopt me into their groups and make me sponsor the meals once in a while. I would just need to give my thoughts and help in the planning phase and they would do all the work. I’m just tasked to supervise and approve or fix the aesthetics once in a while. Some of them would come to me for advice; over beers or over coffee. Most of the time, it was more like having an old person, who’s old enough to be your parent, become a part of your circle of friends. It was funny to note that my voice actually mattered and they would take my advice to heart. Especially for those college kids who had bouts of being demotivated to go to school. I would tell them they can sit next to me and we can attend classes together. They would comply. Most of them finished way before I did because of the extra push. We would hang out after class and they’re an awesome bunch to be with. “May barkada ko to ya pre na trayntahon na, upod pa kami pirmi inom. Sadya man ah.” Something like that. It was cool.
Being a father of 2 boys, and a student at the same time, going back to school saved me some babysitter fees. I would just bring my kids to school and everyone was willing to babysit; even the teachers were taking turns and would tell me to bring the boys to school more often. Some of them were already grandparents who liked having small children around and it was fun for them. I’d bring the boys once in a while and teachers would accommodate. It was easier than what I thought it would be. My father used to tell me that with the way I was behaving in my academic life, I’d one day be so old I’d be going to school with my kids. I thought that it would be shameful and ridiculous if it happened to me. It did happen. It wasn’t so bad, I tell you. “Ang mga apo ko, nak, ngaa wala mo gindala?! Dal-a sunod. Bilin di sa akon sa Faculty Room. Ako na mabakal pamahaw!” The teachers would always tell me things like that. It was cool.
I was also working part-time with some side jobs here and there. I would go to school in my corporate attire once in a while if there was no window to go home and change into my uniform. The teachers did not mind. Most of them would tell me that they liked it better and I am always welcome to join classes dressed like that. But you know, I’d rather wear a uniform. It’s convenient and it doesn’t eat up too much time dressing up. I get discounts when I ride the jeepney too. I bought a lot of uniform sets so I didn’t have to do the laundry on weekdays. I had money now and I could afford things I wasn’t able to buy back then. I was now able to help people better with the money if they needed it. “Nong, mamahaw ta anay. Wala pa kami kakaon. Ubra ta dayon project para kapasa na kita.” I have always known how hard it was to do schoolwork with an empty stomach. I’d throw in some money for meals once in a while. It was cool.
I had better relationships with the teachers when I came back; way better than what it was a decade ago. I had issues with authority back then. I was a boy trying to make a name for himself and the methods weren’t correct. I wanted to bask in the infamy. I quit school and told myself I did not need a diploma. I said to myself that I was too good for it. But it haunted my dreams and I decided to just be off with it. I wanted to put the nightmares to an end. I came back to the university as a working man with mouths to feed. I understood what the teachers were going through. I understood what it was that they were struggling with. The pay. The workload. The financial strains of making both ends meet. I understood that better. I never really took that into consideration a decade ago. I understood that we were adults trying to make our bread. I had to do my share by not becoming a burden to them when they held classes. They would let me hang out with them once in a while and we would grab a cup of coffee or a bottle of beer. Back then I didn’t have the opportuinity to sit down and share a drink or two with my teachers. “Ti ano, Toto? Makape kita sa hapon o mainom kita karon sa gab-i gamay lang?” I would get invitations once in a while. It was cool.
I was able to finish. It took me a couple of years but the time spent doing so was never a waste. I have opened new doors that were closed to me before because I didn’t have that diploma. Opportunities for postgraduate studies, professional civil service license, and all sorts of things that you can’t score without a diploma are now accessible. I used to tell myself it’s just a piece of paper and all you need in this life is a little “diskarte.” I could not say I was wrong but if you can have both, then it’s way better.
It can work out for you too. If you still have dreams to finish school, if you want to go back but you’re too afraid to try because you feel like you are inadequate, too old, don’t have the time – you are wrong. Give it a shot. Take the first step and just do it. Go back to school. It’s your best move.#
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P.S. And you also get to do this and get away with it:
1st day of school; me in corporate attire going to school because I just got off from a client meeting and I had to pay for my tuition.
College kids were in a classroom with no teacher; waiting for class to start.
Me: *enters the classroom*
College Kids: *all rise* Good morning, sir.
Me: Good morning, children. You there (points at the boy sitting in the front row), tell me your name! Then lead the prayer.
College Boy: *tells me his name and leads the prayer*
Me: Ok! Very good. Sit down, all of you. I will get my things downstairs and will be back. Please behave.
College Kids: *in unison* Yes, sir.
Me: *goes downstairs and hurries home so I can change back into my uniform and not be late for the afternoon class*
